Bush Quotes

Here is a selection of fake Bush quotes
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* Environment
"Put wind turbines on postage stamps, but don't stop pouring more gas into my SUV."

"Whenever I see the environment, I think of how much it's in my way."

"All the pretty colors in that oil slick."

* Family values
"You'll like the Bush family; It's a real killer."

"The Supreme Court made me president but it can neither make me a Christian nor a patriot."

* Food
"My favorite cake is yellow. That's why I got mad that Sadaam could not fetch me any yellow cake from Niger."

"I am compassionate. I directed the FDA to not prevent the unemployed from eating cat food."

* Gardening
"A pink daisycutter for your garden tools."

* Drugs
"Rush said that ‘drug addicts should be jailed’ but I ain't asking him to turn himself in."

* Democracy
"In a war, the goals are simple and so am I."

"Lying about WMDs is patriotic but Clinton's lying about the blow job is impeachable."

"Democracy is good during the elections, but not afterwards, especially if the elected gov. doesn’t do what I say afterwards."

* Militarism
"I told the CIA to lie about WMDs and how easy it would be to conquer Iraq to keep me ignorant. I then blamed it when there were no WMDs and the war is a quagmire."

"I made the UN irrelevant so I could do a macho invasion of Iraq. Now I will make it relevant once again, but only so I canmake use of it to clean up my mess."

* Compassion
"I cry over each body bag because I can't remember its new name."

* Religion
"A Missile Shield around earth is like a halo around Jesus."

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file: FakeBushQuotes3.doc